Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up,
we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.”
More
often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people
are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more
scared than us.
You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party,
casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti.
You think to yourself, “she
looks so perfectly calm and confident.”
But if you could read thru her
transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you
might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I
am seated here alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive?
…I don’t like
my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best
friend.”
We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he
ask for?”
He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I
hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and
dad would still work things out.”
Isn’t it funny?
We look at other people, envy them for looking so
outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they
look at us and thinks of the same thing.
We are insecure of other people
who themselves are insecure of us.
We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of
self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped
in quiet desperation.
Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off
your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the
last to know.
I have a friend who never gets tired of talking.
And in most
conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the
things she has to say.
So all of our other friends tend to avoid the
circles whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she
became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her
environment.
One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend.
Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle
topics you want to discuss.
Ask questions like “do you think I am
ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too
loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when were together?”.
In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested
in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and
criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate!
That’s just
the way I am!” Open up your mind and heart as well.
And in return, you may
want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help
her improve her self.
One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the
greatest love of all.”
True enough. In order to love others, you must love
yourself too.
Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.
Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let
them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self
improvement.
Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire
other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.
Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings.
Forget the repetitive
thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on.
Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement.
We need to
stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve
got 10 more reasons to envy them.
We all have our insecurities.
Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had
better things, better features, better body parts, etc.
But life need not
to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.
Self improvement
and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that
you are perfect and you are the best.
It’s the virtue of acceptance and
contentment.
When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel
contented and happy.
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